Looking for some funny but kid-friendly Christmas riddles?
I’ve found it so hard to find whole family appropriate and funny jokes that are actually Christmas themed so I’ve created my own.
At the end of the post, you’ll find a link to download 72 printable Christmas jokes ready to be cut up and added to crackers for Christmas dinner.
72 funniest Christmas jokes:
1 – Why did the Christmas tree go to school?
Because it wanted to get ‘tree’- educated.
2 – What do you get if you deep-fry Santa Clause’s mittens?
3 – What do you call a snowman with a 6-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
4 – How to elves spell?
They use the elf-abet!
5 – What do you call a reindeer ghost?
6 – What goes ‘Oh, Oh, Oh?’
Santa Claus walking backwards!
Are these silly Christmas jokes getting you in the Christmas spirit yet?
7 – What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
8 – Which reindeer has the best moves?
Dancer! Because he can ‘break it down’ on the dance floor.
9 – What do you call Santa’s smallest helpers?
10 – What do elves eat for dinner?
11 – How does a snowman get around?
He rides his ice-icle!
12 – What do you call Santa when he takes a break?
13 – What do Santa’s helpers post on Instagram?
14 – What did one snowman say to the other?
Do you smell carrots?
15 – How do the elves pay for medical treatment?
They have private elf care!
16 – How does a snowman greet a new friend?
‘Ice to meet you!’
17 – What do sheep say to each other at Christmas?
‘Merry Christmas to ewe.’
18 – What did Mrs Claus call her new puppy?
19 – Why did the Christmas tree go to the hair salon?
It needed trimming!
20 – What do you call a cat on the beach during the holiday season?
21 – Why did Santa take his roof to the doctor?
Because it had shingles!
22 – Why did the snowman turn yellow?
Because he saw the snowblower!
23 – What is Tarzan’s favourite Christmas carol?
24 – What do snowmen call their kids?
25 – Why were Santa’s little helpers feeling down?
They had low elf-esteem!
26 – What do the sheep in Spain sing at Christmas?
27 – What’s Santa’s favourite kind of music?
28 – What does Frosty The Snowman eat for breakfast?
29 – What’s Santa’s favorite kind of take-away food?
30 – How did the ornament get addicted to Christmas?
He was hooked on trees his whole life!
31 – How does Santa Claus keep track of every fireplace he visits?
He keeps a log book.
32 – What is Santa’s favourite type of potato chip?
33 – What’s on the gingerbread man’s bed?
A cookie sheet!
34 – Why did Santa go to music school?
Because he wanted to improve his “wrap” skills!
35 – Where does Santa work out?
In the gym-ney!
36 – What did Santa say just before his sleigh broke?
37 – Which of Santa’s friends is the coolest?
38 – Why does Father Christmas go down the chimney?
Because it soots him.
39 – What happens to elves when they don’t do their job?
Santa give them the sack!
40 – What do you call a snowman in summer?
41 – Which of Santa’s Reindeer has the best manners?
Definitely not Rude-olf!
42 – What is a Christmas tree’s favorite candy?
43 – What did Mrs Claus say when she looked at the sky?
Looks like rain dear!
These Christmas jokes are sure to make the kids giggle!
44 – What falls at the North Pole but doesn’t get hurt?
45 – What’s the difference between the regular alphabet and the Christmas alphabet?
The Christmas alphabet has no ‘L’!
46 – How many Christmas presents can Santa fit in an empty sack?
Just one. After that it’s not an empty sack!
47 – Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
So he can Ho Ho Ho!
48 – Why is Santa so good at Karate?
He has a black belt!
49 – What do road crews use at the North Pole?
50 – Why did Santa’s helper take the ladder to school?
Because he heard it was a “high” school!
51 – Why was the math book sad during the holidays?
Because it had too many problems!
52 – Why are Christmas trees so bad at sewing?
They always drop their needles!
53 – Why didn’t the skeleton want to go to the Christmas party?
He had no body to go with!
54 – What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?
55 – Which Christmas carol is a favourite with parents?
56 – What did Santa say to the little boy who was eating too much junk food?
It’s bad for your Elf!
57 – Why did the Christmas lights go to the doctor?
Because they were feeling a little fragile.
58 – What did Santa’s Dog get when he ate the Christmas decorations?
59 – What did the angry snowman do?
Had a meltdown!
60 – Why did Santa wake up on Christmas morning to a parking fine?
He parked they sleigh in a Snow-parking zone!
61 – What do you get if you cross a snowman and a vampire?
62 – What kinds of ball doesn’t bounce?
A snow ball!
63 – Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A Mince Spy!
64 – What’s a child’s favourite King at Christmas?
65 – What did the Snowman say to the mean carrot?
Get out of my face!
66 – What do you call an old snowman?
67 – How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizza?
Deep pan, crisp and even!
68 – Why do mummies like Christmas so much?
Because of all the wrapping!
69 – How does Rudolf know when Christmas is coming?
He looks at his calen-deer!
70 – How did Scrooge win the football game?
The ghost of Christmas passsed.
71 – Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas?
72 – What did one Angel say to the other?
As a little Christmas bonus here are a few Christmas Knock-Knock jokes.
Santa Claus who?
No it’s Santa Claus can you let me in I can’t find your chimney.
Donut open this present until Christmas.
Snow use I’ve forgotten my name again!
Free printable kid-friendly Christmas jokes
Click here to get your free 72 printable kid-friendly Christmas jokes.