Looking for funny Christmas jokes for kids that the whole family can enjoy? Here you'll find 72 clean, kid-friendly Christmas jokes about Santa, elves, reindeer, snowmen and more. Plus get a free printable set you can use in homemade Christmas crackers, lunchboxes, advent calendars or at your Christmas table.
The jokes are short, easy for kids to remember and guaranteed to earn at least a few giggles, or groans from the grown-ups.
Download the free printable Christmas joke cards.
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Santa Jokes
1 - What do you get if you deep-fry Santa Claus's mittens?
Crisp Cringles!
2 - What goes 'Oh, Oh, Oh?'
Santa Claus walking backwards!
3 - What do you call Santa's smallest helpers?
Subordinate Clauses.
4 - What do you call Santa when he takes a break?
Santa Pause!
5 - Why did Santa take his roof to the doctor?
Because it had shingles!
6 - Why were Santa's little helpers feeling down?
They had low elf-esteem!
7 - What's Santa's favourite kind of music?
Wrap music!
8 - What's Santa's favorite kind of take-away food?
Brrrr-gers!
9 - How does Santa Claus keep track of every fireplace he visits?
He keeps a log book.
10 - What is Santa's favourite type of potato chip?
Kringle cut.
11 - Why did Santa go to music school?
Because he wanted to improve his "wrap" skills!
12 - Where does Santa work out?
In the gym-ney!
13 - What did Santa say just before his sleigh broke?
Oh deer!
14 - Which of Santa's friends is the coolest?
Jack Frost!
15 - Why does Father Christmas go down the chimney?
Because it soots him.
16 - How many Christmas presents can Santa fit in an empty sack?
Just one. After that it's not an empty sack!
17 - Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
So he can Ho Ho Ho!
18 - Why is Santa so good at Karate?
He has a black belt!
19 - Why did Santa's helper take the ladder to school?
Because he heard it was a "high" school!
20 - What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?
A Holly-Davidson.
21 - What did Santa say to the little boy who was eating too much junk food?
It's bad for your Elf!
22 - What did Santa's Dog get when he ate the Christmas decorations?
Tinselitis!
23 - Why did Santa wake up on Christmas morning to a parking fine?
He parked the sleigh in a Snow-parking zone!
24 - Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas?
Santa Jaws!
Elf Jokes
25 - What happens to elves when they don't do their job?
Santa gives them the sack!
26 - How do elves spell?
They use the elf-abet!
27 - What do elves eat for dinner?
Elf-abet soup!
28 - What do Santa's helpers post on Instagram?
Elfies!
29 - How do the elves pay for medical treatment?
They have private elf care!
Reindeer Jokes
30 - What do you call a reindeer ghost?
A carib-booo!
31 - Which reindeer has the best moves?
Dancer! Because he can 'break it down' on the dance floor.
32 - Which of Santa's Reindeer has the best manners?
Definitely not Rude-olf!
33 - How does Rudolph know when Christmas is coming?
He looks at his calen-deer!
Snowman Jokes
34 - What do snowmen call their kids?
Chill-dren!
35 - What do you call a snowman with a 6-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
36 - What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
Frostbite.
37 - How does a snowman get around?
He rides his ice-icle!
38 - What did one snowman say to the other?
Do you smell carrots?
39 - How does a snowman greet a new friend?
'Ice to meet you!'
40 - What did the Snowman say to the mean carrot?
Get out of my face!
41 - What does Frosty The Snowman eat for breakfast?
Frosted Flakes!
42 - What do you call a snowman in summer?
A puddle!
43 - What did the angry snowman do?
Had a meltdown!
Christmas Cracker Jokes
44 - Why did the Christmas tree go to school?
Because it wanted to get 'tree'- educated.
45 - What do sheep say to each other at Christmas?
'Merry Christmas to ewe.'
46 - What did Mrs Claus call her new puppy?
Santa Paws.
47 - Why did the Christmas tree go to the hair salon?
It needed trimming!
48 - What do you call a cat on the beach during the holiday season?
Sandy Claws!
49 - What is Tarzan's favourite Christmas carol?
Jungle Bells!
50 - What do the sheep in Spain sing at Christmas?
Fleece Navidad!
51 - How did the ornament get addicted to Christmas?
He was hooked on trees his whole life!
52 - What's on the gingerbread man's bed?
A cookie sheet!
53 - What is a Christmas tree's favorite candy?
Orna-mints!
54 - What did Mrs Claus say when she looked at the sky?
Looks like rain dear!
55 - What falls at the North Pole but doesn't get hurt?
Snow!
56 - What's the difference between the regular alphabet and the Christmas alphabet?
The Christmas alphabet has no 'L'!
57 - What do road crews use at the North Pole?
Snow cones!
58 - Why was the math book sad during the holidays?
Because it had too many problems!
59 - Why are Christmas trees so bad at sewing?
They always drop their needles!
60 - Why didn't the skeleton want to go to the Christmas party?
He had no body to go with!
61 - Which Christmas carol is a favourite with parents?
Silent Night!
62 - Why did the Christmas lights go to the doctor?
Because they were feeling a little fragile.
63 - What kind of ball doesn't bounce?
A snow ball!
64 - Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A Mince Spy!
65 - What's a child's favourite King at Christmas?
A stoc-king!
66 - How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizza?
Deep pan, crisp and even!
67 - Why do mummies like Christmas so much?
Because of all the wrapping!
68 - How did Scrooge win the football game?
The ghost of Christmas passed.
69 - What did one Angel say to the other?
Halo there!
Australian Christmas Jokes
70 - What do kangaroos sing at Christmas?
Joey to the world.
71 - How does Santa deliver presents in the Aussie summer?
One a one-horse-open surfboard.
72 - What does an Aussie snowman look like?
A puddle wearing thongs.
Christmas Knock-Knock Jokes
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Santa Claus.
Santa Claus who?
No it's Santa Claus can you let me in I can't find your chimney.
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Donut.
Donut who?
Donut open this present until Christmas.
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?
Snow use I've forgotten my name again!
Free Printable Joke Cards
Click below to get your free printable jokes.
Here are the details:
- A4 printable.
- 8 pages of jokes (72 jokes in total)
- They are in colour but look great in black and white too.
- Print on regular printer paper or for card-like quality go for 200-300gsm card.
- Personal use only.
How To Use Printable Christmas Jokes
To use the printable jokes:
- download the file
- print using a home printer or take it to your local print shop (or order through Canva)
- cut out the jokes
- use in Christmas crackers, lunchboxes, advent calendars, Christmas cards, classroom activities or Christmas table place settings.
FAQs
Yes. They are clean and suitable for sharing in primary school classrooms but teachers and parents should choose jokes appropriate for children's ages.
Christmas jokes can be used in Christmas crackers, lunchboxes, advent calendars, Christmas cards, classroom activities or Christmas table place settings.
Download the PDF and print at home on A4 paper. Regular printer paper works well for lunchboxes and advent calendars or use 200-300gsm for sturdier Christmas cracker jokes. Choose colour or black-and-white printing. Cut around each joke once printed.
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